Self-generosity

Those fabulous Spring women keep coming up with great questions. Here's another good one: How are you generous to yourself?

These days I'm generous to myself in ways that might seem a little counter-intuitive:

-I'm generous by giving myself a V-8 in the afternoon instead of a piece of chocolate

-I'm generous by getting up at 4:30am to exercise instead of sleeping in an extra 45 minutes

-I'm generous by really letting myself feel uncomfortable emotions with a lot of compassion instead of immediately distracting myself

I'm learning that all of these things that seem sort of unkind actually are the nicest things I can do for myself. Taking good care of myself with diet, exercise, and being with myself have had such clear pay-off for me, that it makes it easier and easier for me to make these kinds of generous decisions.

How are you generous with yourself?

Generosity and boundaries

This week there's another great Spring into Action question: when does generosity turn into being taken advantage of?

One group that I try to show a lot of generosity to is the local homeless community. Because of where I work I have more contact with this demographic than probably a lot of other people and this is an issue that's really close to my heart.

However, I've had to draw a lot of boundaries around my generosity here. I've learned that I can give of myself (a smile, a quick chat) more than I can monetarily, and I have to follow my gut when I start to feel taken advantage of even on that level. If someone appears to want to monopolize my time, I've gotten good at compassionately ending the interaction. I'm getting better at not feeling guilty or that I "should" be any different from what I feel comfortable with.

I've really learned to trust my gut on this one. As soon as I start to resent an interaction, that's a good sign that it isn't really good for either of us. And this goes for an interaction with anyone, not just my homeless friends. As someone who likes to please and be seen as a "good" person, I've taken on more than I can handle in many arenas. But I'm getting better at staying in touch with my body and really feeling when something becomes overwhelming and figuring out how to say no, or to find a solution where I'm still in control and making sure my voice is being heard. But this is an ongoing practice for me.

How about you?

The path of generosity

Hooray! The wonderful women of Spring are continuing Spring into Action and this week's question is: what does generosity mean to you, and how are you generous?

I have to admit that this is something I work a lot with. Generosity is considered one of the six paramitas, or transcendent actions, in Buddhism, and so I find myself turning to see what that wonderful rascal and profound teacher Chögyam Trungpa had to say on this topic:

"The Bodhisattva Path starts with generosity and openness - giving and openness - the surrendering process. Openness is not a matter of giving something to someone else, but it means giving up your demand and the basic criteria of the demand. This is the dana paramita, the paramita of generosity. It is learning to trust in the fact that you do not need to secure your ground, learning to trust in your fundamental richness, that you can afford to be open."
~from Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism

I'm definitely not always there, but when I do find myself in this place of grounded openness I find that the barriers between me and other people come down and I want only the best for them. I sincerely wish for them to be safe, happy, healthy, and live with a sense of ease. And so I give them a sincere and friendly smile. I look them in the eye and really see them, see the fierce, shining beauty of them. And then who really is giving and who is receiving? In those moments I feel like the luckiest, richest person alive.

Creativity habits

This week's Spring into Action prompt is How do you make creativity a habit?

Initially I thought I'd have to pass on this one, because I don't really see myself making creativity a habit in terms of activity. In other words, I don't make time on a regular basis for creative pursuits, a.k.a. "making art," at least not in the same way that I get up at a certain time every day or do the laundry and shopping at set times on specific days. To me those are habits.

Now, I will say that because I have strong habits around things that need to be done, I do have spaces in my life to fit creativity in, so my creative activities probably do benefit from my being a creature of habit. And now that I think a little more about it, making a commitment to try to post something here each day also helps foster my creative habits to some degree.

However, in terms of my mental state, more and more I see that I approach my life with a lot of creativity. I think it is becoming a mental habit - probably somewhere after fear:) When I'm confronted in my life with something new, maybe initially I'll be delighted or excited, then my old friend fear is almost guaranteed an appearance, maybe then good old debilitating perfectionism, but I'm kind of on to these guys these days. More and more I catch myself and reach into my toolbox and there is curiosity, there is openness, there is imagination, there is play, in short, there is creativity.

I'd have to say that's how creativity is showing up as habit in my life these days. And I'm damn grateful for it.

Creativity surprise

This week's Spring into Action prompt is Have you ever been surprised by your creativity?

In my case, I'd have to say that while I've never been surprised that I'm a creative person (it would be much more surprising to find I was athletic or the life of the party), I have definitely almost always been surprised by the things I've created. To me the creative process is almost like giving birth to something which has a life of its own. I'm one of those people who definitely believes she has a muse:) Almost every project I've worked on has surprised me in its finished state. I tend to work really instinctively and have very little mental image of what a project will end up looking like. The same goes for creativity in my "mundane" life, where I call on openness and play to help find solutions I might otherwise have been blind to. I love that surprise!

Creativity in everyday life

Well, it looks like for me one way to use creativity in everyday life is to make my own banner for this week's Spring into Action prompt, which for some mysterious reason became important to me and managed to take up almost all the time I have for this post:)

So how about a quick list? These are some ways I use creativity in my everyday life:

-what I wear
-what I eat
-what I look at and how I look
-what I listen to and how I listen
-what I say
-how I think
-how I move
-how I delight
-how I love

And you?

Musing on creativity

As I've mentioned here before, I really enjoy the Spring: Inspiration in Bloom project and all the wonderful women who participate. And during October they've invited their readers to Spring into Action and participate in answering some questions relating to creativity. Sounds good to me!

The first question is "What's your definition of creativity?" In the past I'd have seen creativity in my life as defined by the many art projects I've been obsessed with over the years. But right now I'm starting to think about how I can apply my creativity to the "problem" parts of my life, my sometimes desperate attempts to balance the abundance that is my life. Today, while trying to get back into the flow of my work after a wonderful weekend away I could feel the stress strangling me. And then I thought about one of my strengths being creativity - the ability to see things from new perspectives, to play with all the possibilities.

Instead of allowing my work to overwhelm me to the point where I lose the larger perspective, my challenge to myself as I focus on some new, big projects will be to apply my creative skills to them. To look at all the options, not to rush, to allow plenty of room for flashes of inspiration, not to forget to play, to dream really big, to encourage collaboration, to accept the possibility that the results of these projects could be way more interesting and powerful than anything I could perceive through the perspective of fear and a desire to just get them done.